Saturday, April 17, 2010

Going Further Than Before:

So much is changing in us, and in me these days. Good changes/difficult changes all at the same time. It's been interesting to see the changes happen in every area of life all at once: physical, mental, and Spiritual.

Today I won a race. It was just a little 5k fun run to help raise money for the Arc of Spokane. Jared let me go past him at the finish line, a time of 22:17-a little slower then I was hoping for, but definitely much better then anything I have ever done before. Never in my life would I have expected to win any race...especially running. I've never considered myself an athlete until last year when we completed the triathlon. After years of casual running to maintain weight goals, I am baffled by how well I am doing, and more importantly how much I am enjoying it. I love reading about running, talking about it, sharing info, getting better, watching other people, and now I actually love doing it.

More importantly, God is just rocking our world these days. and I LOVE it. From reading Interrupted by Jen Hatmaker, to Serving God, Saving the Planet, to Make Poverty Personal...hardly a day goes by when my heart to being tugged closer and closer to what I think it is really supposed to look like. It has been excruciating to look at myself--deep in my heart. When I was in college at Spring Arbor University, I remember several friends of mine who had true compassion for the poor and needy in our community, and they did something about it. The way they lived was different from the way I did. Probably mostly in the way that their hearts were consistently in tune with God's. I think I have lived most of my adult life giving here and there with my time and resources, but my heart has not ached for the poor. I have not lost sleep over the fact that there are 144 million orphans in the world today. Until a few weeks ago. I feel like God has given me a new pair of eyes, that see so much more clearly then my old ones.

We are still figuring out all the changes this means for our lives--some are easy to make, some more painful (primarily because it means seeing my humanity)---but I love making them.

We know without a doubt this will mean adoption for us sometime in the future (once Jared gets a full time teaching gig). Hopefully not too far off in the future. We know this means letting go of many of the "american dream" ideas we never even realized we had. For me, it even means something as simple as trying to never use another disposable cup, having a birthday party in the park downtown and inviting the poor and needy to celebrate with us, and trying to find ways to make a difference with God's love.

So many other small and large changes will come, and I embrace them all.

~Angela M.